Tempting

Temptation...isn't that a constant thing?
I grew up believing that even thinking about sinning was a sin. If you had any kind of thought that was not good, you were sinning. (Call it Catholic guilt, if you will). How much truth is there in that? God tells us that we will be tempted. He knows that Satan will do whatever he can to turn us away from the Lord. So, shouldn't we expect temptation? When we act on our temptation isn't that where we decide whether we sin or not?
So, I have noticed that I beat myself up for being tempted. Have I become a perfectionist? Is that why I procrastinate? Because I don't want to do something that I can't do perfectly? I expect myself to be perfect because I am a Christian. In reality, it is hard to be a Christian...to know what you want to do because it is right, but to do what is wrong because you want to do that too. Then you are sorry because you love Jesus and you haven't done what He would have done.
I find myself expecting people close to me to be perfect now too. I expect them to not even think about doing wrong, especially wrong against me. I forget that they are human and flawed just like I am. My feeligs are hurt because they aren't putting others (namely me) first.
If thinking about doing wrong is a sin, then there is no free will. Then you are saying that evil (ie. Satan and his demons) cannot get to you or cannot influence you. I am starting to believe even more that these negative thoughts are directly from Big Red. He and his minions know how to get us (just like a used car salesman) and they come at your weak spots from all directions.
I will admit that some of my negative thoughts are my own choice, but that is because I have been tempted and fallen to that temptaion...not because I am evil and certainly not because I am not a Christian.
Once again, I'm rambling...just thought I would share.

Allegiance

As everyone knows, today is election day. I woke up this morning, said a prayer for our country, the voters, and ALL of the candidates and prepared to cast my vote. On the way to the polling place, I was listening to the local Christian station. They played Lee Greenwood's "Proud to Be an American" and then an acapella version of God Bless America. The next thing I knew, my eyes were full of tears. They really tugged at my patriotism, but not only that...they tugged at my allegiance to my country and to my God. How lucky am I to be in a country where men died to give me the right to vote...where women went through torture to make sure that other women would be free to vote...where we can not only have an opinion, but use it to make a difference in our world...where we can disagree and still work together...where we know God has blessed us and we are free to spread that GOOD NEWS! I was just really touched by how profound election day is...and so few of us realize that.
I learned another lesson this morning. While waiting in line, a lady slipped and fell in a puddle on the floor as she came into the polling place. Every gasped and a few people asked her is she was ok. One man even moved toward her, but she said she was OK and waived him off. I was torn between walking over to her (about 20 feet) to help her up and keeping my place in line. She looked shaken up, but seemed ok. A few minutes later, I was on the phone with Ken (who had already finished voting...no fair) and she said a few words to everyone in line. She said that she was really broken up that nobody had helped her and she left the line. We heard later that she had gone upstairs to report the fall and she got to vote, but we all felt pretty bad in our part of the line. You know, if somebody had asked me how I would have reacted to that situation before, I would have said that I would help her up and make sure she was OK. But I didn't do that...none of us did. I don't think that I was so worried about losing my place in line...I'm sure they would have let me back in. I don't think I was worried about embarrassing myself. I think I just wasn't sure what she wanted us to do. I didn't want to make a big deal out of it and cause her more embarrassment...you never know how somebody will react. I'm just disappointed in myself that my natural instinct was not to go straight to her and help her up. Shame on me.