Jesus to Me

There is somebody in my life who shows me Jesus every day.
This person puts up with so much from me with compassion and patience. He bears my burdens with me and supports me no matter how ridiculous I am being. He is honest and helpful, strong and sincere. He shows me Jesus.
I watch him take time for other people...compliment them, help them, encourage them...he seems to have a gift for knowing just what somebody needs from him at any give time. I think this is a gift in him...a way for him to be Christ-like. He really does put others before him, but he still respects himself and takes care of himself because he knows God loves him too. He isn't afraid to admit a wrong or ask for forgiveness. He is fair.
I watch him with his children them...growing them up, taking care of them, loveing them with everything he has in him. Its amazing to see the way he loves...its a very full and pure love.
He loves me that way too...accepting me as I am, but never letting me be less than God made me. He comforts me and supports me, but never lets me get away with anything. His love is real and pure and a true blessing from the Lord.

God, thank you for this man that you have put in my life. Though your
plan is not fully clear to us, we are well aware that you are taking care of
us. You have given us the gift of each other and we are greatful.
Please let me be the woman he deserves.
Amen

P.S. Those of you that know him, know exactly what I mean!

Amen

I went forward Sunday morning...the only other time I have ever done that was the day I was baptized. It was hard, but I had to ask my brothers and sisters to pray for me.
I have one thing to say...AMEN!!!!
God hears prayers, he responds to our pleas. I am in no way saying that my worries and problems are totally gone. I'm too human to be care-free, but I do feel relief. I feel some peace that I didn't have before and I feel more on the way.

God is good.

I want to start my own Bible study...maybe a blog Bible study...anybody want to participate? I was studying Job and have stopped. I think I'll start that again. Not sure if I'm brave enough to post all of my thoughts here. I'm afraid that my limited knowledge of scripture could be quite embarrassing, but I have also recently learned that its ok to need help. So maybe I will post here and ask for your help with what I'm studying. There...good idea!
Any takers???

Regret

Does anyone else have one of those things in their past that they just can't get over? Please tell me its not just me. I can't get past it, can't forgive myself for it, can't stop wondering what life would be like if that one thing had not occurred.
I know, somebody will say, "Mandee, the Lord has forgiven you so you must forgive yourself" or, "we are all sinners washed clean by Christ's blood."
Believe me, I know these things in my heart. I know that God loves me and that Christ died for my sins and I am clean because of that. But I'm also human and I don't know how to my head to understand that.
It seems that things come along to throw my mistakes back in my face...its like ANOTHER consequence to my action. There are constant reminders that I really screwed up. I think about it a lot and I'm not really sure how to truly put it behind me.
I just can't help but think that one action that I took years ago has changed everything about me and about my life. Some things will never be the same...never be what they could have been and I will have to go on knowing that and not being able to change it.
Regret is so painful, so hopeless, so defeating.
God has lifted me out of that, why am I still reaching back to it?

Stinkin' Boss

OK, so Boss tells me when I come in this morning that he will need me around 3:30 this afternoon. That was it...all he said...started to walk away. So here is the ocnversation that followed:
Me: "What for?"
Boss: "A conference call" and then tries to walk away again
Me: "With whom?"
Boss: "name of company"
Me: "What will we be discussing"
Boss: "Well, you need to call name of person at company and talk to her about dual entry this morning."

OK...so I still don't know what we will be discussing in the conference call. I couldn't figure out why he was being that way (the way he usually his) when it suddenly hit me. If I don't prepare for this call, then I will sound like an idiot and then he can come in and correct me in front of everyone on the call and sound like the big smart boss that he wants to be, but so is NOT. And this is the way Boss works. This is why I need a new job...sigh.

I have decided...

That today I need to change my attitude about everything. Here are some changes...

• It's not all about me
• God will take care of me
• It's not all about me
• Life on Earth is only the beginning of LIFE
• It's not all about me
• The best trip you'll ever take is to meet somebody half way (ok...so I didn't come up with that one on my own, but its oh-so-true)
• It really is not all about me
• I can't lose focus on the big picture...GOD
• Still not all about me
• I have a purpose whether I realize it or not and God is working on me to get it out in the open
• But it really isn't about me
• Just because you want something doesn't mean you get it
• Obviously, painfully (at times) not all about me
• LET GO!!!!!! I keep telling God that I'm putting my life in His hands, I'm trusting Him, I'm not in control, but good grief...I'm so stubborn!
• Yet, its not all about me! (Thank goodness cause I'm a mess)

So...I don't feel much better yet. I guess it will take more than writing it in a blog. I guess I have to live that way. I really have to get better at letting God be in control. Not only do I want to control my destiny, but I want to control every situation in my life...I've even gotten to the point of trying to control other people. It makes me not like who I have become. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with a lot of the changes I have made in my life. But there is much more wrong with me. I don't know if its new stuff or stuff I've never noticed. I'm a self-centered and shallow spoiled brat! Ew...I didn't like saying (typing) that out loud.

(why is this double spacing when I mash enter?)

Here's what I want to change:

--Obsessed with hating the way I look (and not doing anything about it)

--Being hypersensitive to every little thing the people I love do and/or say.

--Placing expectations on myself and everyone around me to the point that I am in a constant state of disappointment

--Thinking about how I am effected in each and every situation around me, rather than putting my feelings aside to help a brother or sister

--Writing an entire blog about ME!

Now, don't I sound like the kind of person you would want to be friends with? Not really fond of being friends with myself right now. I'll try to revisit this and see if I (God's working harder than I ever could) make any progress. PRAYER WARRIORS>>>you have a mission!

Chowder Menage

That is an anagram of my name. See what yours is here...its kind of funny!

Too much fun!!!

Fun with fridge magnets!

Digital Camera

Ok, so I might be able to use some Christmas money to get a dgital camera. I don't want to spend a lot...$200 is ideal. I have checked out the Kodak CX7430 4.0 Megapixel camera. Looks pretty good...any suggestions?