Friday, May 13, 2005


I don't always enjoy growth or maturity or decisions. In fact, I usually avoid a lot of it. But there comes a time where there isn't anywhere to hide anymore and you've just got to grow up, be mature and make a decision.
Now is one of those times. I keep trying to just say, "OK, just deal with it so I don't have to do anything." Unfortunately, we Christians tend to think that God is our own personal cleaning crew who will clean up every mess we make. While that may be true to a certain extent, He has blessed us with minds and souls so that we can do a little of the work ourselves. I don't wanna!
I don't want to decide what to do. I don't want to make the wrong choice. That's part of what I'm afraid of. I think I'm also afraid of having to live with either choice that I make. One might be easier than the other, but it may not be the right one. But how do I know?!?!?
Sigh...this stinks.


Khris said...

Who owns your heart? To me, that is the question that must be answered first. Who really owns your heart? If you say Jesus Christ owns my heart (that doesn't mean that we'll struggle less), then you should be able to trust your heart.

Psalms talks about trusting the desires of your heart. Mandee, if the Lord owns your heart, then you can trust those desires. Who do you think, then, is putting those desires there? He is....

Shelia said...

I've learned that sometimes decisions are hard because at times we are fighting against whe we're being led to do. I completely understand that choices are hard to make, but it is something we have to do. Sometimes there is no right or wrong choice; there are just different paths. The important thing is how we deal with the consequences of the choice we make. We sometimes have to take risks to achieve or attain what we're reaching for. Remember, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger :-)